Monday, July 20, 2015

Fight Song


While I am dedicating this posting to my Aunt, what I write is valid for everyone of us. 

There is a song that is getting a lot of air play at this time known as "Fight Song", there are several performers singing it right now, but Rachel Platten is getting the most air time.  The song is simple, it's about choosing to be true to yourself, fighting for who you are and what you believe in.  No matter how bad it may appear.

Staying true to yourself and claiming your beauty, wisdom, strength and your spiritual gift is what separates you from those who don't.  To many people choose to give up on work, projects, and way too many give up on their life feeling it is not worth it to go on. 

Wither you are experiencing health issues, as my Aunt is currently doing with Breast Cancer, or even myself with homelessness, how you choose to handle it is what makes you special. 

I have learned over my life that God (Spiritual entity of your choice) does send you messages of hope and love.  It may not come in the way you may want to see or hear it, but he/she does, as is the case in this song.  But this is one of thousands of songs that can help people to be motivated, to hang on a little longer and to know that LOVE does exist for each and everyone of us. 

People are not living YOUR LIFE!  Don't let them tell you what to do and how to do it!  You can hear everything that is said to you, and you can choose to take what you want from it, but ultimately, this is YOUR LIFE!  Live it as gloriously as you choose to do so.  If you live a positive affirming life, you will touch people's lives that you never know of.  Living a positive affirming life sends ripples throughout the world.  To give up on life, to give up on your dreams not only hurts you, but those around you. 

This is Your Life, sing it with glory and praise, even if it is only YOU who hears it.  Trust me, the ripple effect will be beyond your wildest dreams.

Here is a link to the song on YouTube with the lyrics:


Life goes on...I go on

Wednesday, June 17, 2015

When it Rains it Pours

It seems that the weather and I have something in common these past few weeks, it wont stop pouring!  Ok that's a bit dramatic, well almost.

Over the past few months, I have been working hard on my non profit to make sure we continue to grow and in so doing, have had a lot of bills to contend with.  Sadly, the results of our growth has not turned into profit or a steady revenue stream.  This lack of funds, has now made it very difficult for me to pay the organizations bills, and mine.

Add in the fact that I am still homeless, which contributes to other issues, that being the one most annoying of them all...BED BUGS!  Ugh, I thought I was over them from last year.  By the end of summer last year, they were gone and I enjoyed the winter and spring bug free.  Now they are back and biting as much as before.  Don't let "Orange is the new Black" show convince you that they don't bite.  Bed Bugs live off of your blood, so they DO bite and it does hurt.  Especially when they gang up on you in one area, like your feet or hands.  Between the bite and the itching, it makes it hard to sleep at nights.  I have had to resort to sleeping aids to help me get through the night.  And yes, I do wake up, turn on my iPhone flashlight and search out those buggers and squish them dead when they wake me up.  My sheets are polka dots of blood resulting from their deaths.  And yes, I do spray to kill them, but the only way to really kill them is through high heat.  You would think that a storage unit getting as high as 90-100 degrees would kill them, God knows it is uncomfortable for me.

On my way home from an event recently, my car's fuel pump decided to stop working, leaving me stranded 30 miles from home.  Without the car, I had to cancel several appointments for work, and for pleasure.  Now I have to come up with the $700 to fix it.

When the car died is when I found out my insurance had been cancelled on the car, due to lack of payment.  Another item, that needs attention, along with my over drawn credit card, loans, storage fees and the phone bill...all currently past due.  $2,300 worth of bills all due right now!

So, for the past couple of weeks, we have had record amounts of rain to match my record amount of frustration....when it rains it pours!

But, with all of that said, I can do one of two things...wallow in this momentary grief or step up and do my best to have faith in knowing that it will all work it self out quickly and somewhat effortlessly.  I am choosing to believe in faith. 

Let's face it, I've been homeless for four years now, and while I am not thrilled about being homeless, I could be in worst shape.  Things continue to improve for me and that is the key issue.  While I suffer these momentary set backs, they are just that...momentary.  They are not major set backs that cause me to loose everything that has come my way.  I am working, I do have a car, I am doing what I love doing...helping people.  Thus, I am grateful or what I DO HAVE! 

And yes, I do bitch at times about the frustration of a set back, or the feeling of lack, but event then, I remind myself it could be worst.  And yes, I would love for Ellen or some other TV show to surprise me and help me get a home, or for the non-profit to get a huge gift that would make some major improvements for us, but until that time, I must always remain faithful that there is a reason for what I am going through, and that it will be of great value for myself and for others down the road.

I continue to work hard and build a future for myself and for others that has a greater impact on the world.  That is what is important, continue improvement of one self and the value they add to the world in a positive way.

Life goes on...I go on

Friday, May 8, 2015

When Do You Live?

I poised this question first to a friend of mine who didn’t answer the question, as they were trying to figure out what exactly I wanted to know.  So, the next best thing to do is pose the question to myself.  When DO I Live?

From a realistic everyday point of view, I live every second of every day.  But the truth for me is that I exist for every second of every day and rarely to I actually LIVE!  Even in my homeless state, I still have responsibilities that require me to earn a living and for bills to be paid.  Therefore, like most people I have a ‘real’ job that pays my bills, even if the income is very limited and not enough to really live properly.  So when I go to that job and work, I am not working to live, I am working to exist.  To live a life that society has determined is required to be ‘normal’ and to have what the ‘average’ person has.

When I actually LIVE is when I am helping others.  Yes, I am blessed to have a day job that allows me the flexability to take time off to do what I LIVE for.  I just want the two options to combine so I can do what I Love doing and Live to do.  Thus, for those times that I actually get to LIVE, they are rare and far between, so I cherish them even more.

The times that I get to do what I want, which may be as simple as walking on the trails of a city lake, or bike riding, or even chilling out by myself, those times are also moments where I can Live.  These moments are my ‘down’ time, my time to clear my mind to allow me to be open to the Universal thought which in turns gives me opportunities to create and do the things that allow me to help others.  Therefore, even those down times lead me to do what I Love to do and what I Live for.

When you are wrapped up in your busy world, do you find time to actually ‘live’?

Life goes on…I go on