tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25294927191097995962024-03-13T04:25:06.538-07:00Now HomelessThe Journal of a man who has found himself homeless due to a variety of things beyond his control. This is his life and what he is going through. Please feel free to ask me questions, you can send them to BourgeoisMedia@outlook.comNow Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.comBlogger132125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-31455967180726851012016-05-17T05:37:00.000-07:002016-05-17T05:37:46.831-07:00Give A Kidney...Have a Month of Hell<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
It has been two months since my last post, and I am really bad at not following the 'blogger' bible of keeping up to date on postings...sorry.<br />
<br />
I did donate my kidney on Feb 11th to a stranger. After the donation, I meet the recipients family and then a day later the recipient. While the experience was amazing and painful, and clearly not for everyone, I would encourage more people to donate when they are able to do so. Once I recovered and got back into my normal routine, the glow of the moment had passed. Yet, even now, I can see my scar and know that what I did made a lasting impression on the world. Yes, I did say the world.<br />
<br />
Just as with every day life, each thing we do causes the usual ripple effect, both positive and negative. In this case, while I helped a person live a longer and hopefully happier life, what I did was just not for him, but for the world. That single act, did cause a ripple effect, and I sincerely believe that since it was given out of true love for a fellow human being, that the positive energy would continue through his life and the life of his family and beyond each other. Is that optimistic, God I hope so!<br />
<br />
While one would think that raking up of such good karma, I would have a decent if not a great year. Well, as with my soap box life, that is not always the case. At the end of March I was in a car accident, and thankfully no one was injured, but my car was totaled. Then a week later my bike was stolen. A week later my PC crashed and I was down for a week unable to properly do business. Then the finale blow I found out someone had stolen my ID. Ah, what a month it was. But even with all of this frustration, I was also reminded that I have to be very clear in what I ask for from God and the Universe.<br />
<br />
The six months prior to the car being totaled, I kept saying that I needed to replace the car as the repairs (new breaks, transmission, etc.) would cost more then the car was worth. So the Universe answered and removed the car from me. I should have been a bit more clear in asking that the funds be in place first so I could afford to replace the car immediately and with little to no problems. <br />
<br />
The bike reminding me how valueless personal possessions really are and by riding the public bus system, it reinforced the need for replacing the car quickly if I was to be able to maintain my business and goals. Thus, it pushed me harder to make things happen in a better more profitable way.<br />
<br />
The PC was an interesting item, for it crashed just at a time when I was suppose to be in Houston for a week long event. Between it being down and horrible rain storms that literally cancelled bus trips to Houston, I had no choice but to stay home, and that worked out better for me in the long run. Again, the trip to Houston was not something I was wanting to do and had issues with all year, so the Universe gave me an out and I took it.<br />
<br />
Finally, the Stolen ID...well, they can have it...lol So far only one item has been reported from that theft and it relates to a Sprint account and a gold iPhone. At this point in time, there is little to no damage on my credit report as I can easily clear that item and I am prepared for any additional items that may appear. I believe that once they realized I had poor credit after this past year, they were not able to open any additional accounts in my name. And now, with this fraud showing up, they will have a harder time to open any more accounts.<br />
<br />
So while it has been an interesting few months full of frustration and life, I have also become more at peace with it. The situations remind me to 'chill out' and relax. Life does happen, and life does go on. Nothing is ever so bad that one should take their life, nor take another's life. What is the overall lesson I am to learn from my past, who knows. I can only hope that it keeps me on the path I have chosen of prosperity by giving help to others through the Non-profits I have created and that my simple act of kindness outshines the negative aspect of things in the world and helps people to grow stronger, better and more loving.<br />
<br />
Life goes on...I go on</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-91168320833750158812016-02-07T08:16:00.001-08:002016-02-07T08:16:56.466-08:00I'm Donating a Body Part<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">On
February 11, 2016 I will be having surgery in order to donate a Kidney.<span> </span>This is something that I have thought about
doing in some way over the past few years.<span>
</span>It didn’t matter if it was a Kidney, bone marrow, or any other body part
that I could give while alive.<span> </span>I am
listed as a donor upon my death as well.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">When
I started this process, I was not expecting to go through as much as I
have.<span> </span>In some ways I am disappointed in
the process as they claim to want to make it convent for the donor, I find it not
to be 100% accurate.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">I
knew that there would be down time due to the surgery but the additional time
and energy involved was much more then I was lead to believe or expected.<span> </span>I do not have insurance, or vacation time, so
every hour I spend on this adventure, I have lost income.<span> </span>When there are delays made by the hospital
team, it cost me money.<span> </span>It is this
aspect that I am not thrilled with, and to be clear I am not asking for money
from the hospital or any organization to help offset my losses.<span> </span>I do however, expect for the system to be
more respectful of the donor and their time.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">Here
is a perfect example of why I am frustrated.<span>
</span>When I began the process I was clear that the surgery had to be done by
a certain time frame, the first week of February, which would allow me ample
time to heal and be ready for events and programs that I had scheduled starting
in March.<span> </span>Yet, the hospital team failed
to share one piece of information within their group that resulted in a one-week
delay.<span> </span>This delay then offset every
person involved with supporting me through my recovery.<span> </span>This delay put the surgery right on top of a
holiday weekend, where many of my supporters had already had plans made, thus
they were no longer available to assist me.</span></span></div>
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</div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">On
the outset, that would appear to be a non-issue, simply delay the surgery, but
the next two weeks where already booked and that delay would further cost me to
lose money.<span> </span>The next available time
frame I could do the surgery and allow for healing was not until the end of
June or early July.<span> </span>That’s a five-month
delay which could result in the death of the recipient.<span> </span>That’s not acceptable!</span></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">The
hospital staff should have followed protocol, or at least go the extra mile to
make sure that everything was done on time and they worked with me, the donor
to make sure that time schedules were done and simply not dis-respect my effort
and do as they choose and schedule things on their time frame.<span> </span>If this was a business I was dealing with, I
would have fired them.<span> </span>Their actions
were, as I feel completely disrespectful to me.<span>
</span>The example I gave was just one of a couple of items that they did which
added to loss of income and delays.<span> </span>I
wonder at times if they have become immune to the lifesaving surgeries they are
doing and treat this more as a business then a lifesaving procedure.</span></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">Regardless
of the delays and me having to hire help to offset my inability to work
properly, I would not stop this procedure, or delay it.<span> </span>We are dealing with people’s lives, and too
many people die because there is no donor to help them.<span> </span>I do not want to be one of those people who
could help, but chose not to because a corporation failed at its job.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">My
reasons for giving are simple; I have been blessed on many occasions over the
years in many ways.<span> </span>It is because of
being blessed is why I want to give back when I could.<span> </span>I am healthy at 55 years of age, and my time
on earth continues to count down, so now is the perfect time to give back and
help someone else in need.<span> </span>It is a small
thing to do, and even more why I feel respect should be given through the
process.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">Now
with that said, I want to share with you that not even knowing who the recipient
is, I know this is a valid and right thing to do.<span> </span>But, I will share with you some information
so that you can be prepared for what to expect if and when you choose to donate
a body part.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">Blood
Testing:<span> </span>There was times I felt like I
lost weight due to the amount of blood they took for testing.<span> </span>Before the pre-op, I have given over 40 vials
of blood over a six-week period.<span> </span>The
most at one time was 14 vials.<span> </span>This is
critical for many reasons.<span> </span>Of course the
most important is to make sure you are healthy enough to donate.<span> </span>The second is to make sure that your blood works
well with the recipient’s.<span> </span>The rest of
the blood is just follow up as needed.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">Time:
In my case the surgery team is located in San Antonio and I am in Austin, TX.<span> </span>Roughly a two-hour drive which does not lend
well to recovery, pre-op time and any additional testing as needed.<span> </span>The blood tests were mostly done in Austin at
a lab, so that was convent overall.<span> </span>The
down time to go to San Antonio for the final round of approval before getting cleared
for surgery was an all-day event.<span> </span>The
pre-op procedure so far appears to be an all-day event.<span> </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">Surgery:<span> </span>More to come on the blog for this item.</span></span></div>
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</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif;">Stay
Tuned</span></span></div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-10276414276404879292015-07-20T11:20:00.003-07:002015-07-20T11:20:29.281-07:00Fight Song<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Howdy;<br />
<br />
While I am dedicating this posting to my Aunt, what I write is valid for everyone of us. <br />
<br />
There is a song that is getting a lot of air play at this time known as "Fight Song", there are several performers singing it right now, but Rachel Platten is getting the most air time. The song is simple, it's about choosing to be true to yourself, fighting for who you are and what you believe in. No matter how bad it may appear.<br />
<br />
Staying true to yourself and claiming your beauty, wisdom, strength and your spiritual gift is what separates you from those who don't. To many people choose to give up on work, projects, and way too many give up on their life feeling it is not worth it to go on. <br />
<br />
Wither you are experiencing health issues, as my Aunt is currently doing with Breast Cancer, or even myself with homelessness, how you choose to handle it is what makes you special. <br />
<br />
I have learned over my life that God (Spiritual entity of your choice) does send you messages of hope and love. It may not come in the way you may want to see or hear it, but he/she does, as is the case in this song. But this is one of thousands of songs that can help people to be motivated, to hang on a little longer and to know that LOVE does exist for each and everyone of us. <br />
<br />
People are not living YOUR LIFE! Don't let them tell you what to do and how to do it! You can hear everything that is said to you, and you can choose to take what you want from it, but ultimately, this is YOUR LIFE! Live it as gloriously as you choose to do so. If you live a positive affirming life, you will touch people's lives that you never know of. Living a positive affirming life sends ripples throughout the world. To give up on life, to give up on your dreams not only hurts you, but those around you. <br />
<br />
This is Your Life, sing it with glory and praise, even if it is only YOU who hears it. Trust me, the ripple effect will be beyond your wildest dreams.<br />
<br />
Here is a link to the song on YouTube with the lyrics: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQhGnNEFtPk">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQhGnNEFtPk</a><br />
<br />
ENJOY!<br />
<br />
Life goes on...I go on</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-6179798991301973002015-06-17T06:55:00.003-07:002015-06-17T06:55:51.855-07:00When it Rains it Pours<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
It seems that the weather and I have something in common these past few weeks, it wont stop pouring! Ok that's a bit dramatic, well almost.<br />
<br />
Over the past few months, I have been working hard on my non profit to make sure we continue to grow and in so doing, have had a lot of bills to contend with. Sadly, the results of our growth has not turned into profit or a steady revenue stream. This lack of funds, has now made it very difficult for me to pay the organizations bills, and mine.<br />
<br />
Add in the fact that I am still homeless, which contributes to other issues, that being the one most annoying of them all...BED BUGS! Ugh, I thought I was over them from last year. By the end of summer last year, they were gone and I enjoyed the winter and spring bug free. Now they are back and biting as much as before. Don't let "Orange is the new Black" show convince you that they don't bite. Bed Bugs live off of your blood, so they DO bite and it does hurt. Especially when they gang up on you in one area, like your feet or hands. Between the bite and the itching, it makes it hard to sleep at nights. I have had to resort to sleeping aids to help me get through the night. And yes, I do wake up, turn on my iPhone flashlight and search out those buggers and squish them dead when they wake me up. My sheets are polka dots of blood resulting from their deaths. And yes, I do spray to kill them, but the only way to really kill them is through high heat. You would think that a storage unit getting as high as 90-100 degrees would kill them, God knows it is uncomfortable for me.<br />
<br />
On my way home from an event recently, my car's fuel pump decided to stop working, leaving me stranded 30 miles from home. Without the car, I had to cancel several appointments for work, and for pleasure. Now I have to come up with the $700 to fix it.<br />
<br />
When the car died is when I found out my insurance had been cancelled on the car, due to lack of payment. Another item, that needs attention, along with my over drawn credit card, loans, storage fees and the phone bill...all currently past due. $2,300 worth of bills all due right now!<br />
<br />
So, for the past couple of weeks, we have had record amounts of rain to match my record amount of frustration....when it rains it pours!<br />
<br />
But, with all of that said, I can do one of two things...wallow in this momentary grief or step up and do my best to have faith in knowing that it will all work it self out quickly and somewhat effortlessly. I am choosing to believe in faith. <br />
<br />
Let's face it, I've been homeless for four years now, and while I am not thrilled about being homeless, I could be in worst shape. Things continue to improve for me and that is the key issue. While I suffer these momentary set backs, they are just that...momentary. They are not major set backs that cause me to loose everything that has come my way. I am working, I do have a car, I am doing what I love doing...helping people. Thus, I am grateful or what I DO HAVE! <br />
<br />
And yes, I do bitch at times about the frustration of a set back, or the feeling of lack, but event then, I remind myself it could be worst. And yes, I would love for Ellen or some other TV show to surprise me and help me get a home, or for the non-profit to get a huge gift that would make some major improvements for us, but until that time, I must always remain faithful that there is a reason for what I am going through, and that it will be of great value for myself and for others down the road.<br />
<br />
I continue to work hard and build a future for myself and for others that has a greater impact on the world. That is what is important, continue improvement of one self and the value they add to the world in a positive way.<br />
<br />
Life goes on...I go on</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-23809020078841184962015-05-08T11:32:00.003-07:002015-05-08T11:32:13.311-07:00When Do You Live?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I poised this question first to a friend of mine who didn’t
answer the question, as they were trying to figure out what exactly I wanted to
know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, the next best thing to do is
pose the question to myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When DO I
Live?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">From a realistic everyday point of view, I live every second
of every day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But the truth for me is
that I exist for every second of every day and rarely to I actually LIVE!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even in my homeless state, I still have
responsibilities that require me to earn a living and for bills to be
paid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Therefore, like most people I have
a ‘real’ job that pays my bills, even if the income is very limited and not
enough to really live properly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So when
I go to that job and work, I am not working to live, I am working to
exist.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To live a life that society has
determined is required to be ‘normal’ and to have what the ‘average’ person
has.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">When I actually LIVE is when I am helping others.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, I am blessed to have a day job that
allows me the flexability to take time off to do what I LIVE for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I just want the two options to combine so I
can do what I Love doing and Live to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Thus, for those times that I actually get to LIVE, they are rare and far
between, so I cherish them even more.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The times that I get to do what I want, which may be as
simple as walking on the trails of a city lake, or bike riding, or even
chilling out by myself, those times are also moments where I can Live.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These moments are my ‘down’ time, my time to
clear my mind to allow me to be open to the Universal thought which in turns
gives me opportunities to create and do the things that allow me to help
others.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Therefore, even those down times
lead me to do what I Love to do and what I Live for.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">When you are wrapped up in your busy world, do you find time
to actually ‘live’?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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</div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Life goes on…I go on</span></div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-18587369128418234442014-12-22T07:53:00.001-08:002014-12-22T07:53:10.701-08:00How Music Helped Me<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12pt;">During the past three years,
and in fact most of my life, there has always been a small amount of items that
I find to help me through a rough time.</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;">
</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;">One item that I tend to have forgotten way too much, is the belief in
something greater than myself.</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12pt;">Usually
when I forget about IT, IT seems to slap me in the face in some way to remind
me.</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"> </span><span style="font-size: 12pt;">No, I’m not saying that IT can be
vengeful, hurtful or anything of that nature.</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;">
</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;">What I am saying is that when we go off in a deep dark space, we have
forgotten what IT is and how IT relates to us.</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">That IT can be a thousand
different things; God, Yahweh, Inner Peace, etc. IT is what you believe is greater than you
are. It is where you find your strength,
your faith, your understanding of the world around you. To me IT is LOVE! Not a physical love, or solely an emotional
love, but a LOVE that grips you and makes you to want to be better then you
are. LOVE is knowing that you have to do
something in a Positive way to help change lives, to help improve the world for
Everyone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">When one is centered in LOVE
or IT, they show love towards everyone and everything. They act in a way that is unselfish, that is
given freely, that is positive. It is
when we are not centered that our love becomes tainted and negative. That’s when people are injured physically,
emotionally, and when people die. When
we are not centered, it is when we act from our selfishness and do things that
we want and not what is best for humanity.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">During those times that I am
off centered, I usually can be brought back to by my surroundings and in many
cases, those surroundings has music playing.
I am a man who loves to hear an upbeat song, a song that reminds me that
LOVE is greater than I am. And during these
past three years, there have been many songs from my past, and in my present
that remind me of how off centered I can be.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Music, has always been there
to help me through my path, my trials and tribulations. But, I know there are songs that can be
negative, and have no positive value to the world at hand. People express themselves in a variety of
ways, for the place and time that they find themselves. I do the same by choosing songs that are
about LOVE. It is at those times that I
can find my way back to being centered, and at peace. And yes, I will admit, it may take days or
months of listening to a lot of songs to get myself back to where I should
be. But, oh it is so worth it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Over the past few years, even
right before I became homeless, I had started to work on a concept of a
Spiritual Musical using songs that have a dance beat. There is nothing more enjoyable than sharing
joy through dance. To dance to a song
that is uplifting and inspiring is to me a way of sharing the LOVE, to show
ones desire to be in the moment and to show joy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Thus, I have been compiling a
collection of songs that I believe will tell of a story of loss, understanding
and finding of ones centeredness with LOVE.
Will it ever be made, I sincerely hope it will be. I have even thought
of the staging, who would work with me to meld the music together and a fun and
joyful beat. But, if it is not to be
made, I at least can enjoy listening to the music and daydreaming of what it
can mean to millions of others that are off centered and just need a reason to
remember who they are and to celebrate that joy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">As part of this concept, I
had created the Freedom Dance event.
Sadly, finances kept me from doing it more than one year. On July 4<sup>th</sup>, 2013 I held the only
event in Austin TX. I had worked towards
a second event and found a great dance song that I know would touch many people
in different ways. I still hope to make
these events happen down the road once I have more money to spend on creating
it. Until then, I know that IT will
share the concept with others who will create something similar to what I
created. Joy and Love should always be
shared, especially during the dark times of one’s life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Let music guide you to your
peace and joy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt;">Life goes on…I go on<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-31319812207939610092014-12-16T15:24:00.001-08:002014-12-16T15:24:26.496-08:00What is Your Motivation to keep Going?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">What is
Your Motivation to keep Going?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">This
question was recently asked of me by my Aunt.
She has followed my struggles over the past few years, and knows in more
detail of my ups and downs, then I have put on this blog. I was at first taken back by the question,
but I guess I should help explain why she asked the question in the first
place.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">My aunt,
like many people today, is going through a rough time of her own. In fact, for the past five years she and her
husband have been struggling to get out of bankruptcy, refinance their home and
to keep their business alive. They live
in California, so that may help explain why she is having a rough time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">She has
commented to me a few times that she sees me as an inspiration for her, which
for me is a bit bizarre for me to understand.
She’s a few years older than I am, and so I can’t see why a younger man,
who has not lived a very successful life could be an inspiration. But as I have been thinking back over the
past few years, I have done my best to keep living. And that is the key, and why I believe she
sees me as an inspiration.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">My family
never had money, we were always just above the poverty line, well most of the
time we were. My mom had worked hard to
earn a living and support my sister and I.
Not an easy task for anyone to do.
She never had the opportunity for college, so like myself, we could not
advance through company structure as one with a college degree can do. No matter how smart she was, and she was very
smart in her industry teaching her male bosses how to get things done properly,
she never really earned enough, nor was given the opportunity to advance. While I’m no genius, I do have the knack for
learning things that I want to learn, and excelling in my own way. But again, one of my perceived short comings
is no college degree.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">Even so,
I have seen people worst off then myself, even now as I am homeless. I see others on the street barely
surviving. I see people who have good
jobs totally losing it when something bad happens to them. I watch the news and read about people who commit
suicide because they believe their life is not worth living for. And yes, I too had those thoughts at
times. I mean, who wouldn’t. You lose
all physical belongings, a place that was considered a home, your income and
faced with little to no help or the possibility for help. Why continue to live?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">That’s
the thing, while you may have lost everything, you haven’t really lost it
all. Just look around and you will see
people in worst shape then you are. The
homeless, the uneducated, the ones that seem to be kept down by others, and so much
more. In addition, there is one thing
that NO ONE can take from you that really does make a difference; Your Spirit,
Your Soul! Until that is taken away from
you, then life is worth living for. Even
if it seems like you are in hell. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">While
this is cliché to say, ‘from the ashes rises the Phoneix’, ‘God only gives you
what you can handle’, ‘from this, you will become stronger,’ and so many other
sayings. It’s true! But it all depends on YOU! Do you want to become stronger, better, wiser? Do you want to survive? Do you want your life to mater? Even if your answer is a small squeaky yes,
it’s worth trying.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">So while
I continue to look around and see people who are in worst shape then I am, I am
grateful to be where I am, and to know that I am moving forward. There are times that something happens to me
that makes me feel as if I have gone backwards, but even in those times, it is
only temporary. I am 54 as I write this,
and I do not believe my life is over. I
do not believe that I do not still have something of value to give to this
world to help make it better. I REFUSE
to believe that I am done!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">For that
reason, Life goes on...I go on<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-66572661092500226542014-12-04T10:54:00.002-08:002014-12-04T10:54:26.501-08:00The Progression of my bed<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Over the past three years, I have had
many sleeping arrangements as a homeless man.
While there have been moments of joy in sleeping at a hotel room when I
travel for work, the reality is really what I sleep on the most in my storage
unit.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">Below are pictures showing the
progression, while the bed coverings have remained the same for the most part,
the quality of the bedding continues to improve.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-EJPiyDE-tPE/VICtO2q2FBI/AAAAAAAAAEI/x9Gbe6n8d5Q/s1600/bench%2Bmed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-EJPiyDE-tPE/VICtO2q2FBI/AAAAAAAAAEI/x9Gbe6n8d5Q/s1600/bench%2Bmed.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">For the first week of being homeless,
I slept on this park bench that was alongside a run/walk trail at Lady Bird Lake
here in Austin. Luckily, money came in
quick enough that allowed me to get my first storage unit, a 5’x 10’ unit, where
I curled up against my boxes in an extremely small space for sleep. Since I was unable to lock the door while I
was inside, I had to be careful not to kick the unit door open by accident as I
tried to get comfortable, and stay comfortable during the course of a night’s
sleep.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;">After three months of that small
space, I was able to upgrade to a 10’ x 10’ unit, which allowed me space to
stretch out, while also giving me a little more peace of mind about </span><span style="line-height: 17.1200008392334px;">accidentally</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"> kicking the door open, as this new space had a roll up door.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lmVh9idlLPo/VICtXsBnUzI/AAAAAAAAAEY/vCWnuDbHhh0/s1600/bedding%2Bfloor%2Bmed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lmVh9idlLPo/VICtXsBnUzI/AAAAAAAAAEY/vCWnuDbHhh0/s1600/bedding%2Bfloor%2Bmed.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">I had quickly purchased foam bedding
that people use as an extra cushion on a mattress and slept on that for over a
year. I was then able to buying a
folding cot. This simple luxury lasted
only a few months, as cots are not really designed for daily use. The springs soon started to give out to my
200 lb weight and by the end of six months, I lost half the springs, which meant
the material sagged heavily, not giving me much to sleep on. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-5u8odpImqEg/VICtX1IbqTI/AAAAAAAAAEc/1Iqfna8O6aY/s1600/bedding%2Bcot%2Bmed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-5u8odpImqEg/VICtX1IbqTI/AAAAAAAAAEc/1Iqfna8O6aY/s1600/bedding%2Bcot%2Bmed.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;">Instead of buying a replacement cot,
I used the metal frame and bought a piece of ply wood to go on top of the
cot. The 1” thick bedding material from
the cot, and the foam egg shell bedding </span><span style="line-height: 17.1200008392334px;">didn't</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 107%;"> make the hard ply wood easy to
sleep on at times. But, I was off the
floor, not having to fight with roaches, spiders or other bugs that crawled on
the floor at night. So, no matter how
uncomfortable the ply wood was, I was still happy to be off the floor.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">I have been building my credit back
up since the bankruptcy and the loss of my business, and because of that, I
have been able to buy my latest bedding on credit; a roll away mattress. The mattress that came with it, in addition
to the egg shells bedding and cot mattress gives me a much more comfortable
sleep at night. It only took three years
for this progression, and though it’s still not a formal bed in a home, it is
still an improvement and one I am grateful for.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4-VCkPLvjfQ/VICtTEQi6vI/AAAAAAAAAEQ/EABHxHTM8Qk/s1600/bedding%2Brollaway%2Bmed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4-VCkPLvjfQ/VICtTEQi6vI/AAAAAAAAAEQ/EABHxHTM8Qk/s1600/bedding%2Brollaway%2Bmed.jpg" height="320" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;">In time I know I will be in a home of
sorts, and I will be able to buy a formal bed.
Until then, I keep working towards a bright future as I work at my day
job and work my non-profit helping people achieve their goals.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 107%;"><br />
Life goes on…I go on<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<br /></div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-45592692218336422332014-11-26T14:37:00.000-08:002014-11-26T14:37:03.112-08:00An Average Homeless Man?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: left; text-indent: 0.25in;">
Below is a short story that I created for fun, but it does clearly represent in a short concept what my life is and about as a homeless man.</div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">It’s
five in the morning as he begins to wake up.
It’s cold in the room that he calls home. As he swings his feet off the cot he uses as
his nightly bed, the cement floor is cold to the touch. He grabs the plastic 32 oz. bottle, stands up
naked as can be, opens the top of the bottle and inserts his penis into the
hole to begin his morning ritual. This
is a normal morning for him, though on some mornings, he gets to sleep in, but
that is rare and only due to a holiday.
Holidays and Sundays are when the staff of the storage facility he lives
in doesn’t arrive until 10 a.m. or later.
It’s those days he doesn’t feel the rush to get dressed and get out of
the unit as quickly as possible. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">The
fear of being caught sleeping in the 10 foot by 10 foot square box makeshift
home is always on his mind. If caught,
they could lock up his unit and only allow him access during their working
hours, or have him removed. That is not
a possibility for him; there is absolutely nowhere else to go. No friends or
family in the area and no other shelter that will accommodate his working hours
or give him access to an office or work space he constantly needs.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">He
gets dressed in his gym clothes and packs his gym bag with the clothes he will
wear at his day job. Within 15 minutes
of getting up, he is heading out to the gym to begin a long day. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">The
gym serves two purposes: a place that he can use to work out when he has the
mental mindset and physical energy to do so hopefully to keep old age and poor
eating habits from consuming his body and to have a place to shower and clean
up. For less than a $30 per month
membership, he has access to the facilities at any time, day or night.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">The
storage facility he lives in has no running water or gas. Electricity is the only saving grace for him,
as the unit he has lived in now for the past two years, has a faulty ‘sleep’
switch that allows the power to remain on 24 hours a day. He knows how to tap into the system safely,
allowing him to run a mini-refrigerator, computer system, television monitor
and heater or fan, when needed. He
calls this space he goes to every day, home, though he really doesn’t want to.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">When
he first became homeless over three years ago, he started off sleeping on park
benches. Thankfully, that only lasted
one week. The money he had been waiting
on to pay his rent had finally started to trickle in, but it was too late to
get his rental space back. He had to
look at alternative living arrangements.
That’s when the first concept of a storage unit came to mind. He had to place what little possessions he
owned into a safe place, thus a storage unit was a good opportunity. He choose a space that he could afford and
had a little extra space to lay out in during the night. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">That
first unit measured 10 foot by 5 foot and the closest electrical outlet to his
unit was across the hall, four feet away.
That outlet was on an eight minute sleeper, an automatic shut off
system. The running of electrical cords
had to be late at night when the facility was closed to avoid people seeing the
cord. It was at that time, he began the
cat-and-mouse game with the property employees.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">During
the first year and half, living in the storage unit was also the most intense
situation he had ever experienced. In that time, three separate break-ins
occurred to various units surrounding his.
His unit was never touched which was a blessing. But it was the last theft that got his heart
racing the most. As he slept in the
unit, he was awakened by the sound of clanging metal. As he lay there,
listening carefully, he could hear people walking in the aisle behind his unit,
and the dropping of metal onto the floor.
Quietly, he called 9-1-1. As he
was on the phone, he questioned what to say as to why he was there and how to
avoid being considered one of the thieves.
He told the 9-1-1 operator he was working late and his unit was closed
to stay warm. He gave the female
emergency operator his unit number and remained on the line as he quickly got
dressed. When the police arrived and
opened his unit, he was sitting still in a chair. As they talked, one of the officers
recognized him from a previous call a few months prior, a thought of comfort in
one aspect, as he would not be considered as a possible suspect, but also a
thought of fear, not knowing how it would look in the police report. That simple statement could lead to the
possibility of him living on the property.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">The
thieves broke into 10 units, but easily escaped due to the lookout man who was
sitting in a getaway car with the engine running, carefully watching for the
police. This was the last time a robbery
occurred on the property, as shortly after, he purchased a vehicle and always
parked on the lot. A small factor he
believes is helping to deter thefts.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">The first year of his homelessness was a year
of growth and determination for him on many levels. He already had many negatives working against
him that contributed to not being able to find a well-paying job. Add into the mix, a business that had
consumed all of his funds and the economy still in a nose dive, he was left
with no option but to shut it down. His
debts were too much to recover from, so he was forced to file for bankruptcy,
something he thought he would never have to do.
It would be a year before he would get a job of any length. Working part-time jobs was the best he could
arrange during that first year. But
through the gift of a friend, he was given a contract job paying $9 per hour
when he started. Now, 18 months later, he earns $10 per hour. The job is a contract job, so he can work as
many or as few hours as he wants though he tends to work nearly 50 hours a
week. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">A couple of months after getting the job,
another friend then offered to sell him a car.
All he had to do was take over the payments and cover the additional
cost of insurance. The car was another
great gift, allowing him to continue to work and invest time in a non-profit
organization he had started just weeks before his situation arose.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">In
his third year residing in a storage unit, where the temperature has dropped
from a sweltering 90 degrees or more in summer down to 40 degrees at night
during the winter, he learned to deal with the seasons. The temperature didn’t fluctuate much from
night to day in the steel unit, so it actually takes a week or more for the
temperature to go rise or fall in a measureable amount.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">This
past summer was one of the worst seasons.
He not only had to fight the weather in excess of 90 degrees during the
night which led to mild heat stroke that lasted for a week, but also the bed
bugs that arrived in early spring and continued to linger into winter. He feels grateful there aren’t as many as
there was in the beginning. Thankfully,
the hot summer helped kill the bed bugs or at least brought their numbers down
to a small amount…a bearable amount. He
has had to replace his pillows and bedding at least once due to the bed bugs,
but he is grateful to have the money to be able to purchase replacements.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">Along with the cold weather, comes the holiday
season. His desire to have a good
‘holiday’ meal is limited to a variety of simple sources. At first, the meals came from The Salvation
Army kitchen, where the meal had the usual fixings and twice as much food as meals served elsewhere. During the second year, he ate meals at the
HEB holiday dinner, which was just as good as The Salvation Army’s except with
a lot more people. The meals were not served on the actually holiday, but
usually a week earlier. On the actual
holiday, he usually worked in his storage unit finishing up paperwork for his
non-profit, or if funds were available, he would enjoy a simple pleasure and go
to the movies.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">While he misses the enjoyment of having a
holiday meal with family and friends, he is always grateful for the things he
still has. Now, with the larger unit,
and a non-interrupted electricity source, he enjoys the use of a mini-frig and
microwave oven, both of which allows him to eat a variety of frozen meals,
including a turkey dinner. During the
first two years, he was forced to eat as cheaply as possible, which meant going
to the soup lines and buying very cheap frozen dinners, when possible. Both options had downsides, but he learned to
accept them and make the best of what he has without complaining. Now that he earns a bit more, he is able to
eat at fast food restaurants from time-to-time, and on rare occasions, he
allows himself to go to a nice restaurant for a sit-down meal. He misses being able to cook a meal on a
stove or in an oven, but they are simple pleasures among many he yearns for.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">Going
to the bathroom is one of those simple pleasures. When he comes home from his day job, he is
forced to use a plastic bottle he empties daily into a larger plastic bottle,
which he then empties out every three or four days into the local sewer during
the very early morning hours when no one is around and darkness shields him
from being seen. At times, he feels like
he’s cheating on something or doing something wrong, but he is only adjusting
to what is available in such a harsh environment and situation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">His
worst moments regarding his bodily waste, were when he was sick or had minor
food poisoning. A simple small trash
bucket lined with a trash bag has taken on the job of a toilet. With each use, he ties off the bag to cut
down on the pungent smell. Over time,
his body acclimated to a normal cycle, waiting for the morning shower at the
gym or at work. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">While
he has been living in the unit, his life has improved slowly over time. He started off with few possessions; no car
or refrigerator, just a personal computer and monitor, which was able to receive
TV signals. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">After
filing for bankruptcy and losing his business, he has worked hard to build his
credit, which nose-dived to the mid-500s.
He was not prepared at how difficult it would be to build it back up,
but eventually he hit the mid-600s. The
car purchase did not help, since the payments were given to a friend and not a
finance company. Though, he was able to
purchase a new laptop on credit from a store which has given him the ability to
improve his credit score and forming his non-profit.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">All
of these are small wins for him, but they can’t compare to the larger wins he experiences
from the non-profit work. It is this
work that keeps him moving forward, keeps him grounded and sane. While the type of work is unimportant to the
overall aspect of life on earth, it does have value for thousands of people in
small ways. It does help improve
people’s lives and inspires them to do better, to reach for their goals, to
live a more fulfilled life. It is for
that purpose that he doesn’t complain or walk around looking like he’s
homeless. It’s the joy of helping others
that makes his situation bearable for him.
No one else needs to know about his homelessness, nor what brought him
to that point. That information is not
relevant to who he is.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">It
is what he knows about himself that is important to him, not what others think.
But he also knows that he just can’t scream, “I’m homeless,” as people really
wouldn’t understand. People, he has
learned the hard way, are quick to judge.
They don’t want to find out why the situation exists, they just find it
difficult to understand that it does.
Though, as the years have gone by, and with more and more people
becoming poorer day-by-day, he knows his situation is not unique. He knows others have also lived in storage
units on the same property as his, for short periods of time. A couple of whom had been discovered and
kicked off the lot.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">His
personal love life doesn’t exist, though he would love for the right person to
come along one day, but until he has a home, he doesn’t want the situation to
come up, where he would be asked to come over and spend time together. He simply tells those who ask, that he has a
roommate and they agree no one is to come over at any time. People usually understand and accept it. It’s a lie he doesn’t like to tell, but it
has become all too easy to say with each passing day. He believes that keeping a wall up from
getting too involved with people in a romantic way, is the best thing to do for
now.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">He
has just turned 54 and this was not how he envisioned his life when he was a
young lad. He dreamed of the typical
home and loving spouse, maybe kids, and a dog or two; a good job, a life of
happiness and joy. While happiness is
something he does have even now, it was something that he has learned to accept
and understand as he dealt with his situation.
The home, spouse, kids and all, are great, but as with personal
belongings, none of that matters if you do not love yourself first and
foremost. It is that lesson of life that
he began to learn many years ago and finally came to terms with when he became
homeless. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">He
believes that no matter what your situation is in life, if you truly love
yourself, you will get through it. You will not only survive, but become a
better person for it. How you choose to
deal with the negative thoughts and actions by others all depends on the
ability to love yourself. Your faith in
yourself and balancing the good and bad makes all the difference. For one to be grateful for the good things in
life is all so easy to do, but to be grateful for the negative things is a
challenge that most are unable to accomplish.
It is the bad things in life that make or break you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">While
he has never thought of himself to be better than anyone else, he knows that
how he has chosen to deal with things has also kept him from becoming the
tortured soul, the broken person seen sleeping on the streets, living a life of
hopelessness. He has become more and
more grateful for what he has and what he receives on both ends of the
spectrum. He is grateful and thankful
for when he finds a penny on the street or a friend reaches out with an
incredible offer of help.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">Each
morning as he rises, he knows where he is, but he is grateful for what he
has. When he heads to the gym to work
out and take his shower for the day, he is grateful for what he has. When he gets to drive to work and earn a
small living, he is grateful for what he has.
When he is able help other through his non-profit organization, he is
grateful to be of service. When he hears
of accomplishments made by those he helps, he is full of joy for being able to
be a part of the experience. He’s no
saint, and when he forgets to be grateful, life reminds him that his life could
be worse. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">He
only hopes that what little that he does, in turn helps to inspire others to do
better and overcome their obstacles in life.
He doesn’t see himself as special, just an average guy dealing with each
situation life brings him the best way he can.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;"># # #<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: left; text-indent: 0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial",sans-serif; font-size: 12.0pt;">Life goes on...I go on</span></div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-351805213257792492014-11-06T05:39:00.002-08:002014-11-06T05:39:43.965-08:00Another Year - 3rd to be exact<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Howdy;<br />
<br />
I can't believe that it has been a year since
I last posted on here. Yeah, I know, they say a good to great blogger
should be posting daily if not weekly. Sorry, but I just can't imagine
people wanting to be reading about my day to day life as a homeless
man. With that being said, I will now bring you up to date in my life
as homeless.<br />
<br />
First off, I realize that I am in a much
better position then most homeless people are. I have actually been in a
better position since I first became homeless. I believe the main
reason is simple, I try to continue to find the positive, the good that
still exist in my life instead of focusing on the negative. Thus, one
of the main reasons why I don't post on here often, I don't want to post
negative things and dwell on them. Don't get me wrong, negative stuff
does happen, but it's not the main focus of my life. I want the true
balance of accepting both positive and negative and be at peace with
both.<br />
<br />
Since my lost of income and housing in 2011, I
have been able to find a job that pays just above minimum wage (now
currently earning $10 p/h). I have been able to purchase a vehicle from
a friend and paid it off. I have been able to continue building one of
my non profits into a strong organization that continues to expand and
grow for the good of the membership and for the world.<br />
<br />
While
there is much good happening to me, there is the continued lack of
housing. I just can't seem to get to a financial point where I can
afford to rent an apartment or a room in someone's house. The income
from the day job has continued to grow over the past year and half, but
not enough to afford housing in Austin. <br />
<br />
The growth in
Austin is too much and the city is heading for disaster if they don't
get it under control. But, that's for the politicians to figure out.
For now, I have to continue to work towards my survival. <br />
<br />
Most
people have in their minds that I am a bit crazy not focusing more
energy into finding a better paying job that would get me off the
streets, and while I understand their thought process, they don't know
the whole story. Which is typical of people who judge, they only see a
small sliver of what is happening and are quick to judge others based on
their small vision of things.<br />
<br />
Previously I have posted
why I can't get a normal job with a great income. It is for those
reasons that I work hard in building my non profit. True, my non profit
may not serve the over all good of man kind as perceived by many, but
it is something that I believe strongly about and because of my belief I
am willing to continue to be homeless. And with that being said, I
also realize that I have created a catch 22. <br />
<br />
I work
40 plus hours in my day job to earn a decent income, and because of
that, I lack the time to really work hard on the non profit that will
ultimately get me the income I need to afford a decent place to live.
When I leave the day job, I am mentally exhausted, which cuts into my
mind set of doing what is necessary for the non profit. In addition, I
work mostly during the day at the paying job, which has also limited me
in being able to work on the non profit in a proper way. However, I am
also grateful that as a contract employee, I can set my hours so that I
can attend events and work on the non profit when I must. But, my
loyalty to my friend who got me the job also keeps me focused on doing
the job I am being paid for first and foremost during the day. Now you
see the catch 22 situation.<br />
<br />
None the less, I continue
to work towards the goal of the non profit being able to hire me as a
paid director, thus allowing me to continue to grow it and to be able to
find a home to live in. Until such time, I continue to work hard in
developing the non profit and assisting the membership in full filling
their dreams. I honestly believe that by helping others, I will be
helped. I know, many people will say I am crazy, mad and stupid to not
think of myself first. That's fine, that's their point of view. Yet, I
also believe that the mess of our society is tied to greed and I just
can't be a part of that. I want to find that middle ground that allows
for both to exist without the welfare of human spiritual life to be
destroyed in the process.<br />
<br />
Over the past few months, I
have contemplated writing a short autobiography about my time as a
homeless person while developing a non profit that helps others. The
concept sounds good, but I ponder additional thoughts: who would read
this? have I succeed since I am still homeless? Is there a positive
message that motivates and inspires people coming from my story? Is
this just a way of gaining self promotion? Please feel free to share
your thoughts to these questions.<br />
<br />
Life goes on, I go on....<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-1545322330818876532013-12-25T08:57:00.001-08:002013-12-25T08:57:13.241-08:00Reflections of the Past Year and my Future<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Howdy;</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
It's Christmas day, a perfect day to
sit here and update my blog. It's been seven months since I made an
entry. After all there was really no reason to. Life continues to
move forward and that in it self is a great thing. I am still
working my contract job, and recently got a raise. Though it's not
enough income to get me into an apartment, the job has helped me to
improve my life and move me forward to the time when I can finally
get out of my storage unit.</div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I continue to pay off debits and make
my car payments, insurance and other bills. Though I don't have
enough to pay for health insurance as mandated in the Health Care
Act. But, that's ok. I removed myself from the food stamp program
as I really wanted to release a negative item that I felt only kept
me pinned down, restricted in my income situation. While I can't
cook a meal in my unit, I am still able to focus on eating properly,
and to that fact, I've gained 25 lbs of fat...not what I had
anticipated happening, but I do love my sweet foods.</div>
<br />
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
While I sit here writing this, I am
reminded that this is the season for Children. They get to have time
with family and to receive gifts. For those older and wiser people,
we recognize that Christmas is a time of birth, not just that of the
Christian Jesus, but of our selves and of the world. Many celebrate
this period by celebrating Winter Solstice, or by celebrating New
Years. It really doesn't matter what the celebration is, but to
truly recognize that it is a time that you can review the past, and
celebrate the future.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
When I was in my late 20's, I went to a
person who was doing a Past Life Regression. A session where you can
go back in life, or past lives to hopefully see why you are in this
world at this time. In this case, we had done the past very briefly,
but most of the time ended up being on a future event: My Death.
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
That experience that I saw for myself,
with no guidance or direction from the person there with me, has
lasted with me all these years. And now, I am a year away from that
time period that I believe I will die...murdered to be exact. I will
not go into the details of what I saw, for one simple reason...it may
not happen. It may not even be a physical death at all, but a death
of the past...letting go of what has kept me bound to certain parts
and acts in my life. To that extent, is why I am brining it up in
this blog.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
What I saw over 30 years ago may or may
not happen. But because I held onto that thought, that possibility,
I know I did and did not do things because of that. I allowed a
vision to control my life. Thus, as of today, I allowed something
that happened in the past to make me who I am today. Maybe that was
intended, maybe not. But the fear of dying was prevalent in my life
ever since.
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
The one thing I have learned during my
life time is that you NEVER know when you will die. My mother was
run over by a bus. Too many friends have died of AIDS or Cancer. I
myself was in a car accident that took another's life. We just don't
know when we will die, nor should we. We should instead focus on the
moment that life is presenting us.
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br />
Has I have written many times, I did
not expect to be homeless, nor to be homeless now for over two years.
But I am. I had to deal with the frustration and the anger
associated with what brought me to that point. But I also had to
recognize that I was blessed at the same time. To this day, I see
many people worst off then I am. I see my life continuously
improving, and at the same time, I am able to help others improve
their lives too through my non profit organizations. I AM BLESSED!
I am also blessed that I can continue to be optimistic of my future,
even if it's a day more, or twenty years more. I am blessed that I
can live each day that I have working and enjoying what I can do.
Sure, I contemplate that I could be doing so much more if things were
different. Instead, I work towards making things different and not
just for myself.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
On my birthday last month, I was having
a really rough week, one of the worst weeks all year it seemed. But
that ended up being my best week of the year. A gift from a friend
had turned everything around for me that week, and reminded me of how
blessed I am. It was an unexpected and greatly appreciated gift that
brought me to tears, even now as I write this I tear up. I can not
express enough to him what it meant, but I believe he knows it.
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
So, for me to languish in the self pity
of where I am, that being homeless. I can instead celebrate the
blessings I have and to continue to move forward not just for myself,
but for everyone who's life I touch. I can not allow a vision to
determine my future, or to create fear. I must constantly remind
myself that I am part of a larger piece, a part of a Universal plan.
A plan, that as far as I am concerned is to help improve the lives of
all involved.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Time will tell, and until then...may
you also be reminded of your blessings and don't let the past rule
your life. Live in the moment!</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Life goes on...I go on.</div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-63786507469557692352013-04-29T15:28:00.000-07:002013-04-29T15:28:16.091-07:00Already 18 Months...ugh<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I was talking with a person over the weekend, we've known each other for a good two months now. Slowly we have become friends, and both understand their is a desire for more to happen in our relationship, but it's going slow and that's good.<br />
<br />
Has I have written before, I don't normally tell someone that I am homeless, after all, it's still something I am not happy about...who would be?<br />
<br />
While we were talking about a variety of things, including spiritual understanding and growth, I brought up my homelessness as part of a point of how we sub consciously choose to do things, even when we know they may not be good for us...in this case, me still being homeless. <br />
<br />
The admission caught the person ever so briefly which was nice to see. But what caught me off guard was the fact that I realized it's been 18 months already of being homeless. Hell, I didn't think I would last more then a month, and here it is 18 months later. <br />
<br />
In addition, while I still refuse to call my storage unit home, it is in many ways just that. Even when a friend recently offered me to stay at their place with a lot of conditions, I felt that I should just stay put. I have a routine, I have my belongings, I have a place that is mine. With that admission, I can see why it is hard for people to move out of their 'comfort' zone at times. Granted, my option was limited and short term, so not a major change, but it also brings me to a better understanding of others and of myself.<br />
<br />
The good thing is that life still continues to improve. I still have a contract job that is helping me pay my old and new bills. I now have a car with payments, gas and insurance requirements being meet. I have additional items that help me live better and a happier life. So while I am still homeless, I continue to move forward and in time, I pray real soon, I will no longer be homeless. Until then...<br />
<br />
Life goes on...I go on</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-76503274314873799622013-03-28T09:24:00.001-07:002013-03-28T09:24:51.674-07:00Homeless man NOT so Homeless<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<img alt="Jeffrey Hillman, 2012 (© Robert Caplin/The New York Times/Redux)" height="316" nodeindex="1" src="http://blu.stb.s-msn.com/i/C9/37A426EFAFA94A285BE9263DB9B4A_h316_w628_m5_cIOPFXLBT.jpg" title="Jeffrey Hillman, 2012 (© Robert Caplin/The New York Times/Redux)" width="628" /> <!-- Article - header --><br />
<div class="headertext" nodeindex="2">
<h1>
Barefoot homeless guy apparently has apartment, 30 pairs of shoes</h1>
<span>1 hr ago</span> </div>
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Jeffrey Hillman, better known as "the guy in that viral photo that a cop gave all those shoes and socks to," was recently profiled by the New York Post counting a stack of bills on the way back from "work" in Times Square. The Rev. John Graf, who says he pays Hillman's utility bills, admits that Hillman has 30 pairs of shoes in his Bronx apartment and has been "working the streets … for years," reportedly making up to $1,000 a day. NYPD Commissioner Ray Kelly offers the most levelheaded take on this news: "That's life in New York. ... But it was a generous act of kindness." He's right: Let's focus on the good in people, not the bad.</div>
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I read the above article and was immediately pissed at the fact that this so called homeless man is not homeless. He has an apartment in NYC? I'm sorry, but as a homeless man sleeping in a storage unit, where does he get off duping people? But he's not alone! Even here in Austin, TX, there are a lot of people who take advantage of the kindness of strangers to bring in a few hundred dollars a day, and maintain a place to live.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Thus the question is: Why should I be pissed at someone who is working the system for their benefit? </div>
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<br /></div>
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The answer is not easy to explain. I guess I am tired of the people who scam the system to make money. I get that we are a culture now of easy money, hell we have been that way since the 80's at least. Work as little as possible and make as much as possible at the same time. We see this in so many ways; politicians, movie stars, athletes, reality TV stars, etc. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div sizcache05367223046154339="44" sizset="16" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml">
I tend to believe that if you work hard, you will succeed. But, I have to be honest, it's getting harder to believe that's true. Is it?</div>
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<br /></div>
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I would love comments on this. Is working hard and being rewarded fairly a thing of the past?</div>
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<br /></div>
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Life goes on...I go on?</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-76330440905488450472013-03-05T09:00:00.001-08:002013-03-05T09:00:15.085-08:00Yen/Yang of Life<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Things are slowly improving in my life and I very happy with what is happening.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have bought an SUV, it’s older and not great on gas, but it’s something that I can work with on payments, ins., etc.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thus, it’s mine and it adds hours to my day, and more fun to my life…lol</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Now with that being said, I have experienced the third break in to the storage unit property in four months.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The break-in’s in of them self are not bad, they don’t get to my unit, which is always good.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But the fact that I am the one calling 911 is a bit nerve racking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sooner or later, the property management is going to finally click that I am living there, and they will have to through me out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While things are improving, the money is increasing, and the opportunity to move into a better housing situation is getting closer, I’m just not there yet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thus, I can’t afford to loose what I have at the moment.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Recently, I had a discussion with a spiritual teacher that indicated that they would always want to life in joy and happiness, more then fear and anger, which on the outset is great.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But in the discussion, I was saying that I just wanted to live in balance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thus, not giving too much energy to one or the other, but to acknowledge each of them for what they were and to just be.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This concept I was discussing is based on my small amount of knowledge of Buddhism, living a life of balance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Now, while I deal with the break-in, which can be negative, I also deal with getting a vehicle, which can be positive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So it’s the yen/yang of our world…good and negative always finding a balance between the two of them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s where I want to be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not going up and down on a rollercoaster, but feeling the middle road of life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Being at peace as each item comes along and I deal with it as needed, but not giving into the high or lows…the rollercoaster of life.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Is that wrong?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Life goes on…I go on</span></div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-67563581369081319582013-02-10T06:52:00.002-08:002013-02-10T06:52:50.985-08:00Mr. Reed Misses the Point - He's Just a Bully<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Recently an uproar has been made about
an actress being overweight. While I don't agree with the tactics of
Mr. Reed attacking the actress publicly, one does wonder what message
is being sent by the actress to the millions of children and adults
who are struggling with being overweight.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I struggle with that issue constantly
myself, though my weight is 175 lbs and am 6' tall, I am actually
slender, but I love my sweets and junk food just like everyone else,
and it is those items that pack on the most fat weight.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br />
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
There is no telling what an overweight
persons struggle is, if they have one at all. We have heard of
certain deficiencys in a body’s metabolism that may cause easy
weight gain, and what may make lossing the weight harder if not
impossible. We have heard that it may be caused by stress, or lack
of ones self worth. In many cases, it is just that we have become
addicted to fattening foods for various reasons. No matter what the
reason is, it's for that person to deal with. If they choose to get
help, it's available for them. If they are happy with how they look,
then it should be OK for them to be that way, and they should be
willing to take on full responsibility for any illness it may cause
at their expense.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br />
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I do know one thing that I can attest
too, and that is how large companies have created fattening foods and
have managed to get the federal government to approve them for their
SNAP (food stamp) program, when they should not be. At the same
time, shame on the government for not giving enough money to people
so they can afford to purchase healthy foods.
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br />
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Here is a perfect example: During my
homelessness, I have been able to arrange to get food stamps to help
me eat. That's $200 per month for a single person. That means, if I
want to eat enough food to 'fill' me up, I can only spend about $6.00
per day on junk food. Not healthy food, but junk food, the food that
makes me gain weight and destroys my body's health. Can you imagine
eating enough food for a whole day on just $6.00? You really can't.
That's why my food stamps usually only last 20 days at best, and
that's me staying at $10.00 per day.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br />
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
I can't even buy vitamins that would
help keep my body healthy as it's not a 'food' item. Yet, you can
buy soda's, snack candy, chips and so much other unhealthy food with
the food stamps.
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br />
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
This maneuvering of the big
corporations to suck more money out of the government is a sham in no
uncertain terms. By forcing low income families to buy unhealthy
food, they then force them to need medical treatment more, which
means more money out of the federal governments pocket...YOUR POCKET!</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br />
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Healthy foods need to be the only thing
available to purchase on food stamps, and the government needs to
keep pace with rising food costs. The last increase on food stamps
was over four years ago, and prices have increased over 30% since
then. Thus, less money to buy food, forces people to buy less
healthy food, which means more medical bills, which means more taxes.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br />
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
But sadly, as with everything else
going on in this world, the American public will allow this to
continue saying it's not their problem. Or even better yet, like Mr.
Reed, they will publicly humiliate someone saying a variety of mean
things to try and shame that person or persons, while not really
understanding what the problem is, but only to make themselves feel
like they are helping address a problem, when all they are doing is
being a 'bully' and to be real honest, chicken shit by not addressing
the real issues at hand.</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br />
</div>
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Life goes on...I go on</div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-72602822428061443242013-01-25T09:11:00.001-08:002013-01-25T09:12:52.912-08:00I have a Job!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Howdy;<br />
<br />
As of today, I am going to be working for a company as a contract employee. It's not much, just $9.00 pr hr for 20 hrs a week, but it's something and I am happy for it.<br />
<br />
This job came about from a friend of mine that I had developed since July of last year. Slowly this person and I became friends, and while he was aware of my situation, I never asked him for help, for I can't do that, and I had no clue if he could do anything for me. But, when something came up in his company, he thought of me.<br />
<br />
Even the issue of my felony from years ago, may be an issue at this time, he has faith that we will be able to over come it. <br />
<br />
So between the extension of work with Starbucks through the end of February, and this new contract job, I am feeling pretty damn good that things are improving for me. Now, if I can get my Consulting company moving forward, along with the non profits that I had created, I should be moving forward in a positive way. In no time, I may actually be moving into an apartment...YEAH!!!<br />
<br />
Life goes on...I go on</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-59490603906333567352013-01-18T14:11:00.003-08:002013-01-21T09:16:52.272-08:00Try....Even if you get Burned?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Recently a song came out from the artist known as Pink. I love most of what she has sung over the past few years. This particular song seems to sum up my attitude towards life. Now keep in mind that her song is about love, while I am applying it to general life, for to me it does seem to apply. The chorus goes like this:<br />
<br />
<em>Where there is desire there is going to be a flame</em><br />
<em>Where there is a flame, someone is bound to get burned</em><br />
<em>Just because it burns, doesn't mean your gonna die</em><br />
<em>You got to get up and try, and try, and try</em><br />
<em>You got to get up and try, and try, and try</em><br />
<br />
<strong>It is so true!</strong><br />
<br />
Let's face it; life can be a Bitch at times. Yes, you may loose love, you may loose a loved one, you may loose so much in life. God knows I have. But that doesn't mean I can't keep trying to do what my desire is.<br />
<br />
Ok, over the past year I have lost my business, a home, and so much more. Yet, even with all my bitching on this blog, I really do hope you see someone who continues to fight, even in a loosing battle. Someone who gets back up and try again. After all, why should I sit and mope about things more then I do. I get it out of my system, do my little tantrum and then get back into LIFE!<br />
<br />
Even during this past year, I have meet so many interesting people. I still have helped a variety of Authors get their books published. Artist have been given a chance to do what they love doing. Hell, I've even given a couple of attorneys a chance at acting like fools. <br />
<br />
Bottom line is this: No matter what your desire is, as long as it is for good, then go for it! Don't let the Nye Sayers keep you down. Don't let fear keep you from touching the flame of fame, happiness or the light. Get out there, set your self up for success and believe in achieving your desire.<br />
<br />
Add light to the world in a positive way and you will be a better person for it. Even if you don't achieve what your desire is, you will have been on a road that made you a better person. If and only if, you realize the lessons you learned along the way and share your desire in a positive loving way.<br />
<br />
Life goes on...I go on...And I want YOU to dream BIG!</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-61662202839060209892013-01-16T10:32:00.004-08:002013-01-16T10:32:47.798-08:00Vacation Time<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Recently I submitted a nominee to Ellen
DeGeneres TV show...a Vacation to Australia as part of her show. The
nominee was me. While there is no doubt I could and would love a
vacation of any type that is paid for, I have to admit that it feels
strange in so doing. Yes, I've had a rough two years. Yes, I've
lost a lot. But, I know I'm not alone, so why should I nominate
myself? Do I deserve to win? Did I suffer worst then someone else?
NO!
<br />
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
When I walk into a soup kitchen, or
down a street in some areas, I see people who are in worst shape then
I am. Has I work on reorganizing my business, I know that I am
blessed in many respects to be able to even do a business. When I go
to bed and sleep in my storage unit, I am reminded every night that I
am not out in the freezing cold, or crime ridden streets, I have a
place to sleep. I have some form of money coming in to help keep me
moving forward. So many people don't have it as good as I do.<br />
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Yes, I would love a vacation, even to a
country that's on my 'want to visit' list. Yes, it would be great to
sleep in a hotel bed, or eat a normal meal. Yes, it would be GREAT!
But it's not necessary compared to getting into my own place, to be
earning an income on a regular basis. Yes, I would love to have an
experience that is uniquely Australia, but having a normal life would
be even better.<br />
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
So when Ellen's team chooses someone to
win that trip, I sincerely hope that person really deserves it
compared to me, or anyone one else who is suffering or going through
a rough time. Don't let me down Ellen!<br />
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Life goes on...I go on.</div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-79281642288609779432013-01-16T10:31:00.001-08:002013-01-16T10:31:25.962-08:00To Old to Work? NOT!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I have commented on this before that I
have felt the discrimination against me because of my age. It's
true, most employers don't want to hire someone of age because they
think that 1) they have to pay more and 2) that they bring too much
baggage to the job.
<br />
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Baggage, while I would say experience.
But employer's consider the fact of trying to educate an older person
to 'their' ways is to expensive and too much of a hassle. Much
easier to train a young person who may not have 'baggage' and who
they clearly can pay less.<br />
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
So this does bring an interesting
opportunity for us older workers. What do we do to survive. Many of
us can use our experiences to create a new business, or we can choose
to launch a new career in a totally different field. Many of us are
doing just that, as I am with my consulting business.<br />
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Sadly at the same time, many older
workers are also finding them selves forced to go back to work in
order to survive the economic situation they had not expected to
happen. Hopefully, they too are able to create new adventures in
life that benefits their lives in many ways.<br />
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Thus, while our current economy and our
lack of respect from the business world has forced many of us to be
creative, it has at the same time, helped the economy by us creating
new businesses and opportunities for those who are younger. So while
many think of us too old to be of value, you may want to re-think
your ideas and be glad for our experiences and our desire to continue
to be a valued part of the world.<br />
</div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">
Life goes on...I go on</div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-49059196909661795852013-01-03T13:39:00.003-08:002013-01-03T13:39:21.473-08:00Moving On in the New Year<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
As of today, January 3, 2013 I filled
bankruptcy for my company with over $308,000.00 claimed to over 100
people and businesses around the globe. That does not include my
personal bankruptcy of $100,000 that I did in 2011. All of this due
to the finale nail in the coffin delivered by Lightning Source/Ingrim
for their immoral acts. However, with that said, now I can move
forward by still helping people get their books published through my
consulting businesses, but also work on other projects that I also
hope will help move the Universe in a more positive direction.<br />
<br />
The focus for this year is of course
finding a valid source of income that allows for me to get an
apartment, or a room to rent in a house. I am over this cold ass
storage unit...and I am more then ready to live a life that I am
entitled to, and deserve to live. Not saying filthy rich, just a life
that is more abundant and allows me to enjoy simple pleasures of
life.<br />
<br />
As the New Year moves forward, I want
to be able to grow in prosperity and help others do the same. A
simple request, desire and an act that we all deserve.<br />
<br />
Life goes on...I go on<br />
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-23581457824502594222012-12-29T09:05:00.000-08:002012-12-29T09:05:01.469-08:00Robbery at Storage Unit<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I awake this morning feeling good. When I opened my door, I noticed that there was property out on the catwalk just down from my unit. I thought it was strange to see that much stuff out at 6 am. <br />
When I left at 6:45 I noticed someone was walking down the corridor near the stuff...figured still strange, but that they were cleaning out and moving out.<br />
<br />
As I left, I saw in another corridor that two units were open, that was strange as no one was there and again stuff was out on the catwalk. I walked up to them to see if someone was in there, no one was and the locks were on the ground broken. Another robbery and it seemed that someone was still in the bldg other then me.<br />
<br />
I immediately began to leave and called 911.<br />
<br />
Has I was on the phone with the police telling them what was happening I also thought about what I was going to say to them so I would not be found out as living there, plus I had a bag of garbage in my hands...had to get rid of that before the cops arrived, avoid more questions. I dropped the trash off in a trash bin near by.<br />
<br />
As I waited for the police to arrive I saw a truck that had been parked close to the scene was leaving. <br />
<br />
I stood close to the gate, but not too close in case they jumped out for me. The police used my description of the vehicle and pulled the truck over after it left.<br />
<br />
I went back in to the building and counted 9 units had been broken in to. I went back out to wait for the police. Several very cold minutes later as I watch them pass by the facility, and then turning on their sirens to stop the truck that was just a couple of blocks away, they finally arrived. I told them that I had come in for my gym bag and what I had seen. They of course asked for my ID and gave it to them and showed them everything that I had seen.<br />
<br />
I wasn't asked any questions about me being there which was good. They had questioned the guys about them being there, they said that they were getting their gardening stuff, which the police verified was in their unit, which was close to the break ins. I confirmed that there were a lot of gardeners there renting units. They let me go.<br />
<br />
I'm not scared of being there at night, but it raised some interesting questions about the robbery happening while I was asleep.<br />
<br />
When I returned to the facility, I stoped by the office and was welcomed with a hand shake from the property manager, and with a thank you. While in the back of my mind, I was concerned about questions as to me being there, there were none, so I relaxed just a tiny bit. As I stood there I could see them going through the video, luckily they had already determined who it was and what time it had happened.<br />
<br />
Here is an interesting tid bit. I'm about 75 feet away from the storage units that were broken into. The cameras tag the criminals at 1:30 AM coming in and leaving at 2:17 AM. At 2:15 AM, I awake and turned off my heater that I had on at the time. I also relieved myself. I wonder if me making noise at that time may have scarred them off? I had turned off a loud machine, and was moving around in the unit...was that enough noise for them to get jumpy and leave? They left out a door that was less then 25 feet from me. An interesting aspect to all of this.<br />
<br />
While I am not scared about the criminals, I was actually more concerned about being found out and being kicked out. Time will tell as to what may happen there. For now, it appears that I am ok.<br />
<br />
Clearly with all of the changes going on in my life, I need to make another critical one...move out!<br />
<br />
I can only pray for continued growth in my business which will allow for me to have the money to move into an apartment in short time.<br />
<br />
Life goes on...I go on</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-17471521811010498352012-12-23T07:24:00.000-08:002012-12-23T07:24:44.025-08:00Howdy, merry Christmas and Happy New Year<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div style="text-align: left;">
What a year it has been!</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I have been homeless for 15 months and have experienced a great deal of love in places I would not have expected and in many cases from people I would not have expected as well.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
At the same time I have also experienced a year of great frustration. As I finished out this year, I have been forced to close my business which created a great deal of sadness for me. Not so much for the loss of my business, but for more of the true sadness of letting down the over 100 Authors and Artist that worked with me. Because of the "finale" nail in the coffin for my biz came from the immoral acts of a large company, it made it even harder to believe, as I could do nothing about it. The Authors and Artist were the ones who suffered due to that companies actions and that saddens me greatly.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
But as they say, when God closes one door, He opens another. It is my sincere hope that my new adventures; <a href="http://bourgeoismedia.com/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #0072c6;">BourgeoisMedia.com</span></a> and <a href="http://wefiction.com/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #0072c6;">WeFiction.com</span></a> will still allow me to help people full fill their dreams in a multitude of ways.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
So, it is with that hope and my fearless mind set of continuing to live life to the fullest, that I am excited by the new Mayan cycle, a wonderful Holiday Season and the New Year.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I wish you and your family great joy, happiness and lots if fun this New Year and many more to come.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
L&L</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Alan</div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-77278889959128827112012-12-21T10:33:00.000-08:002012-12-21T10:33:35.011-08:00A New Beginning<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
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As I write this, it is the day that a new cycle is to begin according to the Miyan's. I for one am full of great anticipation for it.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Lets face it, the past 5,125 years of the Miyan calendar has been quite a trip. So much war, hatred, scientific advancements, and love has been demonstrated during the past, one can only imagine what the future holds.</div>
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<br /></div>
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I do, however, worry about the future. As I said, there has been so much war and hatred, I am fearful to a point that we have yet to learn from the past. While more and more Love is showing itself, I sincerely and joyfully hope that it will be ever increasing to overwhelm the negativeness of hatred and fear.</div>
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<br /></div>
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We as humans must learn that greed and fear is not what makes us wonderful humans. It is our ability to love, to accept people for who they are and to learn to live with our differences that makes us much better and greater then animals. </div>
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<br /></div>
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At the same time, as a person who is emerrsed into the creative aspect of life, I also hope we allow our children for generations to come, to explore and develope the various arts. It is after all from our creative imagination that has allowed our scientific minds to grow and create such wonders.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Part of my remaining years will be dedicated to helping establish communities that support the creative mind as seen with my first project WeFiction.com. I anticipate this is just the beginning for me and for others.</div>
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<br /></div>
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So as we celebrate another holiday and a new year, may each if us take the lessons of the past, wither personal or global and use them to help make our world a greater place to live and grow in.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Blessings to you, your family and future generations.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Life goes on...I go on</div>
</div>
Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-45987394149851339922012-11-28T09:14:00.000-08:002012-11-28T09:14:06.215-08:00Lightning Source/Ingrim Wants to go to Court<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If you have been following my little drama over Lightning Source/Ingrim and how they damaged my company so bad that I had to shut it down, here is LSI's latest offer:</span><br />
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span>I may be able to get approval for the following if you agree.</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span> </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span>LSI will waive any remaining debt you owe LSI, after the offsets which is approximately $800.00.</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span>LSI will cease any collection methods and will not show your company in default.</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span> </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span>We both sign a mutual release.</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span> </span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span>Thank you for your time,</span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span> </span></span></div>
<div>
<span><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span><b>Josh Dailey</b></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span>Corporate Counsel</span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span>Ingram Content Group Inc.</span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span></span></span></span> </div>
<div>
<span><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span><strong>Here is my response to them:</strong></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span></span></span></span> </div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri,sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span><span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span><div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Dear Mr. Dailey;</span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"> </span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">I get you don’t want to address the failure of the staff at LSI and how it will impact the case when it goes to trial, after all to even address it in some form, is a sign of admitting something happened.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"> </span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Your offer is still unacceptable. Let’s begin with the fact that you keep referring to a balance owed of $800, to be accurate it’s only $328 plus change. Your company has not removed an invoice that became invalid when you cancelled the contract, nor does it include the payments that were made. Continuing the show that people in your company are not being forth right with you, nor honest about the situation.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"> </span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Bottom line for me is this, LSI damaged my company beyond repair and it WILL pay for the damages. The remaining question is how much LSI is going to pay. While my last offer had a typo of a 5 and not of a 4 as it should have been in the figure, because of your email, I am leaving that amount where it stands, thus, my offer remains as is, including the deadline.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">With Respect,</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-size: small;">The time line I had established has passed and they did not pay, nor come back with a reasonable offer, thus they are daring me to go to court. Sadly, as of this posting, they win. I just don't have the money to sue them. It doesn't mater that what they did was wrong and that they should have taken care of it like any good moral company would do. No, they took the Bully line of thought and continue to treat their customers rudely and with disrespect, and Americans will continue to allow it.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-size: small;">This is what is so unfair, there are so many attorney's out there that can't get a job as an attorney, but they refuse to lower their rates because of their oath. People who are in my shame loose out to Bully's because the law industry is acting like a Bully...pay us what we demand, even if we starve or go away. I mean really....</span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-size: small;">Life goes on...I go on</span></div>
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Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2529492719109799596.post-2822652381759499802012-11-26T14:28:00.000-08:002012-11-26T14:28:56.826-08:00Lightning Source/Ingrim...are they serious about setteling this?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Howdy;</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Well I decided to push the issue about Lightning Source/Ingrim paying me what they owe me per the contract that we have signed. As of November 1, 2012 the first amount due to me is $674.52. December 1, 2012 the amount due is $853.30, and as of January 1, 2012, the current amount is about $137.38; for a total owed to me of $1,665.20.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Lightning Source/Ingrim claims that I owe them $2,466.14. This does not include $160 in payments, nor the removal of a $312.00 invoice for services not received. Apply these items, and I owe them by their records $1,994.14. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That means, if you apply what is owed to me and what they claim I owe them, I would be left owing them $328.94. That's it. They shut down my business over a sum of $328. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This is what I don't get. Up to the time they closed out my account, I was averaging $750 a month in income from book sales directly through their site. That means if they had not closed my account, they would have received all the money they claimed I owe, plus made money on top of that, and would continue to be bringing in more money. Am I the only one to see the stupidity in that?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Which brings me back to the real issue. LSI got caught doing something wrong and they choose to try and blame me for owing them money as to the reason they closed out my account. Now mind you, I was only two months behind in money owed, and based on our payment agreement, I was only 1 payment behind. Not six months, not a year, only two months! Is any of this making sense?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">None the less, I sent out emails to three people at LSI this morning asking where my money was since they had hired an outside attorney to demand payment in full for $2,466.14. Legally you can not demand payment in full for an amount owed, and hold funds that are owed to the person, after they had already agreed to have those funds applied to the so called debit. By doing so, they are double dipping: they are getting payed twice for the same debit. That is illegal! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Here is the response I got from one of their VP's:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Arial','sans-serif';"><em><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Pub Comp was factored into the original payment plan as a partial offset to what is owed to Lightning Source. The July pub comp balance, (paid in Oct) was $22.26.<o:p></o:p></span></em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Arial','sans-serif';"><em><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Best,<o:p></o:p></span></em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Arial','sans-serif';"><em><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Debbie<o:p></o:p></span></em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva';"><em><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Debbie Jackson, CCE<o:p></o:p></span></em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva';"><em><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Assistant Vice-President, Credit Services<o:p></o:p></span></em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva';"><em><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Ingram Content Group<o:p></o:p></span></em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva';"><o:p><strong><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Here is my response:</span></strong></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva';"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p><div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>Yes it was. However, since you cancelled the agreement and have since hired local attorneys to represent your company for the full amount owed in the original agreement, plus an additional unknown sum, I am entitled to all funds owed to my company.<o:p></o:p></em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>Therefore, failure to pay the funds in a timely manor as outlined in the contract that existed at time of said earnings, your company is not only in full violation of the contract, failure to pay is now considered thrift of service and is punishable by law.<o:p></o:p></em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>Thus, you and your company have until 5 PM central time on Tuesday, November 27th 2012 to have the current amount owed to my company in my hands.<o:p></o:p></em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>I suspect you will find every excuse possible to not pay it, which will add to my law suit against your company.</em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><strong>Their Attorney's Response:</strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman','serif';"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>Will you provide me with the name of your attorney to discuss this matter? <o:p></o:p></em></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman','serif';"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>Pursuant to Section I(C) of the Lightning Source POD Agreement, signed by you, "LSI reserves the right to offset any Client past due balances for services performed under this Agreement against any amounts LSI may owe Client." You currently owe approximately $2500.00, of which $1600.00 in Publisher Compensation will be applied to the past due balance, leaving approximately $800.00 still owed to LSI and are past due. These amounts may change if books are returned within 180 days of termination. <o:p></o:p></em></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman','serif';"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>As stated previously, I would like to resolve this issue as efficiently as possible and am interested in discussing with your attorney, or you if not represented.<o:p></o:p></em></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman','serif';"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>Thank you,<o:p></o:p></em></span></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: 'Arial','sans-serif';"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em><span style="color: black;">Josh Dailey<o:p></o:p></span></em></span></span></b></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: 'Arial','sans-serif';"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em><span style="color: black;">Corporate Counsel<o:p></o:p></span></em></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: 'Arial','sans-serif';"><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>Ingram Content Group Inc.</em></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #1f497d; font-family: 'Arial','sans-serif';"><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><strong>My Response:</strong></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>Dear Mr. Dailey,</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>I had sent you three emails to resolve this issue fairly, but you ignored my last two emails prior to today outlining a resolve. Thus, I don't believe you are serious in your statements.</em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /><span style="color: black;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>In addition, you can not hold my money or apply them to a balance owed when your company has hired outside legal representation to collect on the full balance, ($2,400) and an additional unknown amount. Since the Austin law firm has been directed to collect on all funds, and since the agreement that I entered into willingly with your companies staff was cancelled by your staff, your company gave up all rights to any funds owed to me.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>Therefore, I once again remind you that you have until 5 PM central time Tuesday, tomorrow to have the funds of $1,600 plus change in my hands before I file theft of service charges. Granted it won't result on any one in your company being arrested, it will assist my case in federal court and most importantly the court of public opinion.</em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /><span style="color: black;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>The fact that your company is trying to collect on an invoice that was issued after the repayment agreement was made, and which does not apply once the contract was cancelled is not acceptable.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>Your companies continued support of the damage that Mr. Killebrew did to my company, and the resulting irrevocable damage done to my company because of his actions and lies is un-acceptable.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>I continue to leave the door open to a fair and reasonable resolve of this situation up to the day that we file suit for damages. However, it is clear that you can not stop your staff from continuing to add insult to injury to my company.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>If you are sincere about resolving this issue, I strongly recommend that you create a reasonable and fair offer real soon. Damages keep piling up against your company.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>With Respect,</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span> </div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><strong>His Response:</strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman','serif';"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em><span style="color: black;">I did not respond as reopening your account is not an available option, however I am serious about resolving your concerns. LSI does not owe you any money, but you do owe approximately $800.00 after offset is taken in account to LSI. Contracts do not dissolve simply because they are terminated. Would you like a copy of the Agreement? The Agreement between Food For Thought and LSI was to either, print the titles you had the rights to as you directed or to offer the titles available to retail channels. Do you believe LSI did not honor one of these services pursuant to the Agreement? I ask this question to ensure we both understand our side to this discussion. You also mentioned the availability status of your titles changed, which I could not find any record of LSI making changes. Availability may be changed by individual retailers we do not control and does not affect the availability LSI shows for your titles.<o:p></o:p></span></em></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman','serif';"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em><span style="color: black;">I do want to resolve this and hope you reconsider my previous offer as I believe it was fair and reasonable to both. Is there another offer you propose? <o:p></o:p></span></em></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman','serif';"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em><span style="color: black;">Thank you for your time,<o:p></o:p></span></em></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><strong>My Response:</strong></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>Dear Mr. Dailey;</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>I get that you want to keep referring back to the contract that was signed between myself and Lightning Source, you are betting that I am dumb enough to think it’s the holy grail as far as you are concerned. Sorry, but you and I both know that when representatives of your company agree to do something in an email that act can alter the contract, and it becomes part of the contract. In addition, when your financial team wrote out an agreement, and then altered it right after signing it, and then not notifying me at any time, that is a major legal issue.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em> </em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>I have a witness willing to testify that Lightning Source deliberately changed the status of my books that were listed for publication with your company. That action caused harm to my company, plain and simple. The damage done by Mr. Kilebrew along with other damages has forced us to close down our company. This is all due to your company’s actions. </em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>In addition, the fact that your company closed out contracts with other companies that may or may not be related to this business, also indicates the intent to harm my business both directly and indirectly.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>You can quote the contract all you want, but you and I both know those emails by every staff member of your company will be added to the contract and I will receive a very sweet judgment from your company. So show me some respect and stop jerking me around.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>I had offered you a settlement nearly a month ago that you should have taken then before your staff members continued to harm my company, but you choose not to.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>It should also be noted the contradictions between you claiming I owe LSI $800, which is not correct due to the cancellation of the contract, and the fact you hired out side legal assistance and they demanded payment in full for an amount that is not accurate will not look well in the courts or juries mind set. </em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>LSI has screwed up big time. Therefore, here is a finale offer to you:</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>LSI will wipe out all claims of money owed by Food for Thought Books, Inc.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>LSI will pay out in a cashiers check made payable to a person of my choice for $5,800. That’s double what your company is claiming I owe it and an extremely small settlement compared to what could be in the millions I will otherwise get.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>You will cancel any and all agreements without side legal assistance and or bill collectors immediately. </em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>LSI will NOT show me or my company in default for any claims by LSI.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>In exchange, I will sign an agreement that states that neither party knowingly did anything wrong, or how you had worded it last month.</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>I suspect you will laugh at the offer and that’s fine. But, let me be very clear with you. I have not discussed one critical item with you during these emails that guarantees a win for me. If you are willing to spend thousands of dollars to defend your company and take a chance on winning your case, then go for it. You will have to ask yourself, and discuss with your company officials, is it worth it? Can this one unknown item cause so much public outcry that it could damage the reputation of LSI to a point that they will loose more money then what the payout will be?</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>The choice is yours. You have until 5 PM CDT, Tuesday, November 27, 2012</em></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><em>With Respect,</em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva';"><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p>Ok, I know enough to be dangerous, but not enough to really win the case in a court of law. The reality for me, and this is MY reality, is that they are not serious about resolving the issue. They screwed up several times, and they think they can Bully me into submission. Sorry, I'm tired of that BS! </o:p></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva';"><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p>Their actions caused harm to my business and to my Authors. </o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva';"><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p>But, sadly, at this moment I don't have the money to sue them, so they win. The only thing I can do is to post on here and hope people get the idea that you have to stand up for your rights. We are the consumers, and we have the ability to demand respect, fair prices and quality products. LSI and others jerk us around because they have the mindset that they can Bully us into submission by use of Attorney's and their legal wording. They screwed up, and just like when I screw up as an individual or as a small business, I have to fix it and make it right. They should too!</o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Monotype Corsiva';"><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p>Life goes on...I go on</o:p></span></span></div>
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Now Homelesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14303895232619321040noreply@blogger.com1